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Archive for the ‘True Conversations’ Category

Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David. comediansincarsgettingcofee.com

Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David. comediansincarsgettingcoffee.com

July 5 parade. 2014. Paul Goldfinger photo ©

July 5 parade. 2014. Eileen on the hood.   Paul Goldfinger photo ©

Scene:    Driving with Eileen on Asbury Avenue towards the circle. Our destination was Wegmans for coffee.

We don’t usually go this way, so Eileen is looking around at the scenery. There are many used-car lots and car repair shops. I see a sign that warns the public that Asbury Park is concerned about “quality of life” and has a “zero tolerance policy towards excessive noise.”

Paul: “Do you think that includes loud gunshots?”

Eileen: “Looking around, it seems like this would be a good place to buy body parts.”

Me: (There is a brief pause before what she said actually sunk in.) “Did you say……body parts?”

She: “Uh—- yes, I guess I did.”

Me: “You mean auto parts—right?”

She: “Yes…. watch out!  I hate this circle.”

FLORIDA GEORGIA LINE  “Cruise”

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Superhero with green cape. Mom holds the cape so Superhero can wash his feet. Paul Goldfinger photo reporting live from a bench on the boards. ©

Superhero with green cape. Mom holds the cape so Superhero can wash his feet. Paul Goldfinger photo reporting live from a bench on the new OG boards. ©  2014 posted on Blogfinger.net.

 

By Paul Goldfinger,  Editor.

Scene:  People leaving the beach in Ocean Grove.  Before climbing the stairs at Main Avenue, many stop to wash their feet. The water spray is close to the exit, causing some congestion.  A family was leaving, and one of that group was a little superhero with a bright green cape.

He was struggling a bit because the cape was getting in the way of washing his feet.

Mom :  “Superhero, you have to lift your cape.”

 

Finally Superhero made it onto the boardwalk where he ran around, a mile a minute, so that his cape would fly through the air behind him.

Superhero moments before he flied away.

Superhero moments before he let go of mom and flew away. Blogfinger photo ©

SOPHIE ZELMANI   “It’s Always You”  from My Best Friend’s Wedding

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Scene:  Courtroom.  Union County Superior Court.  Presiding the Hon. Ross R Anzaldi.  (2014 repost)

 

Scenario:  The judge had settled a divorce some time in the past, however the husband and wife appeared again this time because of a disagreement over a provision in the divorce agreement.

 

The judge heard the case and then went to his chambers to make a ruling. When he emerged he turned to the courtroom and said:

 

“It seems we stood and talked like this before.  We looked at each other in the same way then.  But I can’t remember where or when.”

 

Smiles around the courtroom.  In case you don’t know, these are lyrics from the Rodgers and Hart 1937 hit  “Where or When.”

And it is a true story.  It is also true that Judge Anzaldi has a lyric for just about anything.  And he is my oldest friend–can you tell?

 

DION AND THE BELMONTS .  c. 1960.   From their “Best of…” album.

 

 

 

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Del Ponte’s Bakery, Bradley Beach. July, 2019. Paul Goldfinger photograph. ©

 

By Paul Goldfinger, Editor @Blogfinger

Scene:  Morning at the Del Ponte’s Bakery in B. Beach. We wanted some coffee cake to go.   There was a small line when we arrived.  Eileen got on the queue while I stayed back, observing the activity.  In front of me was a young man waiting his turn. He wore a backpack and white rimmed sunglasses.

Instead of eyes front, he kept repetitively turning to the left, looking out the window.  Del Ponte’s is located across from the BB train station. Before I struck up a conversation with the man, a woman walked in and stood behind me.

Me (to him:)  What are you looking for?

He: I’m looking for the train.

Me:  Oh.  I thought you were looking for a certain pastry.

He:   No, it’s just drinks.  (The man was clutching two bottles of ice tea, and he seemed nervous about missing the train.)   I have to meet my brother in New York.  He’s leaving for Indiana, and I want to say good bye.

Me:  Oh. (I’m feeling nervous for him.)

He:  He’s going to Notre Dame for graduate school.

She  (the woman who was in line, but eavesdropping on our conversation):    Why don’t you get going now and I’ll get the drinks.

He: Thanks, but I’ll pay. (At that point he puts money on the counter and then runs out the door, across the street and through the park to the train station–he made it.)

Me:  (to the woman) That was so gracious of you…..(She smiled)

 

BILLY SWAN  “I Can Help.”

 

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This is a model showing what the device looks like. Internet photo

By Paul Goldfinger, Editor @Blogfinger.  zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Scene:  My bedroom in Ocean Grove 10 pm.  I was to undergo an at-home sleep study by wearing electrodes around my forehead and a flexible tube in my nose while I sleep.  The office gave me the number of tech support in case I have any questions. So I got all hooked up, but there was a special sensor on my forehead that I had a question about:

Me:  10 pm:  Dialing the number of tech support.

Tech Support:  Recorded message: “Hello, this is tech support for sleep study patients.  We are closed now. If you have any questions, call us at 9 am.”

Me:  “Customer service is declining in our society.”  I hooked it up by guessing what to do.

Sleep device  3 am. It speaks and I wake up:     “Your tube is out of your nose. Please fix it.”    I did.

Sleep device 4;30 am.  It speaks and I wake up:  “Your head sensors are out of position. Please fix the head band.” I did.

Me  8 am. The headband was too tight and I now have a headache requiring medication.  I get up and feel crappy after interrupted sleep.

The end of the story:  I expect to receive a report that I have interrupted sleep and require a tube in my nose, attached to a machine,  every night  for as long as I live.  Will I agree to that?  Probably not.

 

BETTE MIDLER  from her album It’s the Girls

 

 

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Volan web site photo.

Café Volan web site photo.

Scene:  Café Volan on Bangs Avenue in Asbury Park.  We stopped there for an excellent cappuccino.  (link below)

https://blogfinger.net/2015/07/15/a-quixotic-search-for-a-fine-coffee-shop-near-og-try-cafe-volan-510-bangs-avenue-in-a-park/

Cappuccino.: double espresso , hot milk, and milk foam. Internet photo

Cappuccino.: double espresso , hot milk, and milk foam. Internet photo

We are sitting at a table, and at another table nearby are two young men having coffee.

In walks a rugged looking guy wearing tan pants, boots, T shirt and a vest that says “POLICE” on the back. He is carrying a gun in plain sight. He is ordering three coffees to go. The two guys start a conversation with the man, and one of them says:

“Are you undercover?”

The policeman responded  (couldn’t hear it) and then he left with his coffees.

I told Eileen that the policeman must belong to a special unit such as a swat team  because he was in Café Volan, having a gourmet coffee drink rather than a cup of Joe in Dunkin Donuts.   But the reality is, when in Rome you drink cappuccinos, even if you are a cop on the beat or two Grovers undercover as hipsters.

DJANGO REINHARDT  “Brazil”

Paul and Eileen Goldfinger, Editors,  on assignment in Asbury Park.

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By Paul Goldfinger, Editor @Blogfinger

Scene: Wegmans  under 15 items aisle. A woman is getting checked out,  but the process is unusually slow. The bag checker is having an issue.  Behind her is a man, maybe in his 60’s, gray haired,  with a shirt and tie, as if he had been at work. He is waiting to pay for two items.  I am behind him, and he seems like the sort of guy who might exchange a few words with me while we’re waiting.  He’s  facing sideways, so I’m looking at his profile. During our true conversation, he never looks me in the eye.

Me:  “Are you an impatient person?”

He:   just looks ahead.

Me: “I’m impatient.”

He:  just looks ahead, but he turns slightly and smiles, so I know that he can hear.

Me:  I start fiddling with my wallet to find the store card and the credit card; need something to do since this guy is giving me the silent treatment.  So I do what every bored person does these days—whip out my iPhone and check things. I also try to guess what’s going on in his head.  As a doctor, I’m always looking for a diagnosis.

This experience reminds me of when the Ocean Grove United crowd (including some who are my Grovarian neighbors) gave me  the silent treatment  at their recent Great Auditorium Sunday silent demonstration. It’s also the same with the OGHOA whose Board has an actual silent treatment policy towards Blogfinger. It’s the only policy of theirs that actually is effective.

If any of you see me in the Grove, please say something so I’ll know that I haven’t  gone deaf.

NOTE:   “The silent treatment is an abusive method of control, punishment, avoidance, or disempowerment (sometimes these four types overlap, sometimes not) that is a favorite tactic of narcissists, and especially those who have a hard time with impulse control, that is, those with more infantile tendencies.”  (ref: Wikipedia)

BLOSSOM DEARIE  with a quiet song, “Corcovado.’

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Scene:  I am leaving a shop in downtown Fort Myers when I notice a man entering my peripheral vision.  He is on the sidewalk walking backwards towards the corner where I am.   He is holding onto the handlebars of a backwards motorcycle which he is pulling backwards as well.  I cannot resist saying something as he reaches my location.

Me:  “Did you know that you are in reverse?”

He stops, looks at me with cold eyes and says nothing.  Then he keeps walking backwards until he reaches the corner at which point he redirects into forward gear and crosses the street.

Sometimes people don’t know when I am kidding—especially in Florida.

That, I believe, is a one-way conversation for a two-way event. Can one person have a conversation with another who doesn’t speak?  I think so.   Below is a YouTube video of a man who only goes one way—backwards for 25 years.

–Paul Goldfinger, Editor @Blogfinger

 

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By Paul Goldfinger, Editor @Blogfinger

 Scene: Wegmans as I pushed my cart past the cheese department towards seafood. Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye a blur appeared and then she suddenly raced past me.

I took her in within two seconds: young, thin, graceful, wearing multicolored tights with leggings, and a bright scarf around her neck and a headband besides. She was blond and pretty and she was pushing a small cart quickly, darting side to side to get somewhere in a hurry.

The apparition  breezed by me, cutting me off, and I came to an abrupt stop as I watched her pass by. She seemed like a fleeing gazelle or a bird in flight. I was mesmerized as she continued on, turning sharply to the left, moving towards seafood and then left again. I could not take my eyes off her.

Then I heard a male voice speak to me, “Isn’t she beautiful; she’s a professional dancer, you know. ” It was a man standing behind me, perhaps in his forties, with dark hair, a smile, and a small pony tail. “She comes here often,” he said.  He wasn’t with her; he seemed to materialize, like a solitary Greek chorus, for the purpose of explaining what I had just witnessed, as if the moment required further clarification.

I looked back in her direction, but she was heading toward the bakery and was almost out of sight.  I turned to him and said, “Wow. That’s something! And she really can move that cart around.” I felt foolish with that remark. It was too mundane. It should have been more insightful. I looked away for a second and then back—he was gone.

Now I felt that I had witnessed a sort of flash ballet, and, in retrospect, I really enjoyed it.

Then off I went to pick up a sesame bagel, coffee and my morning review of the news. I tried being more graceful with my cart, but no way.

JOHN WILLIAMS AND ITZHAK PERLMAN        From  the film  Scent of a Woman:  “Por Una Cabeza”   Tango.

 

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conversations

 

Scene:  Wegmans coffee bar. A mom is placing her one year old into a shopping cart. She is annoyed.

Baby:  Goo la la

Mom:  The seat belt is broken. Your father found us a defective cart.

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