Blogfinger team of cow investigators, authors of the dossier. Paul Goldfinger photograph.
A preview of Spring Break in Ocean Grove. Hide your wives and children! Source: The Blogfinger dossier.
We are releasing our dossier which contains a verified report emanating from our secretive team of investigative reporters. Some say it is fake news, but our sources say “otherwise.”
The dossier reveals that several fraternities from certain major universities will be spending Spring Break in Ocean Grove in June, 2020. They will be bringing a few hundred coeds who will join them at a huge, non-stop party on our beaches. We hear that alcohol will be concealed in Weezer ices, and these party-goers will fill every available room in town, so Airbnb should do very well in the Grove.
There will be bikini and “shake that thing” contests as well as chuga-lug competitions, and the Camp Meeting Association will not object to the goings-on as long as ground rents are paid for beach blankets. All the boys will be shouting, “Show us your t**s.” (tents)
No name-tags will be needed, because these revelers. (like BF commenters) prefer anonymity, and, besides, they have no place to pin the name-tags. The music will echo all over town—mostly Hip-Hop. And Blogfinger is planning a special edition of “Girls In their Summer Clothes,”or “Girls without their summer clothes.”
Neptune Township will be selling hook-up permits to take advantage of all the bio-activites which are expected to occur. No one over age 25 will be allowed on the beach. 80% of the Neptune PD has volunteered for overtime patrols on the beach and around the OG hotels and B and B’s.
The Chamber of Commerce is thrilled. They love this idea—-much better than the British Car Show., and they won’t have to shut down our streets. Gov. Murphy will allow the sale of marijuana for this occasion.
The CMA will erect a giant stage for the contests, and the Last Chance Jugs Band will play this song:
Sources: Documentary from Panama City, Fla. called “Liberated.–the New Sexual Revolution ” (Netflix,) and the Blogfinger Dossier.
The CMA summer events booklet will feature a centerfold from last year’s thong-a-thon. (incidentally, this past summer a young lady wearing a thong and no coverup strolled past Days and the CMA World Headquarters on Pitman Avenue. Blogfinger reported that the CMA walls, like Jericho’s, did not come tumbling down. The only damage were ice cream blotches on the fronts of a few shirts, and her yelling at me for photographing the sight.
LOL!!!
Sounds like fun !